Damien
Damien came to us as a former priest with the Raelian Movement. What a new religious movement, like Raelianism, has in common with the old standbys, is that they are quick to shun a loyal adherent and leader for asking questions. Read on, as Damien shares his story.
My journey may sound unusual, as the religion I dedicated my life to for 33 years in an atheist religion, which claims to reject all supernatural and to be pro science. My departure was therefore not about losing a belief in god which I did not have to begin with, but rather about rejecting irrational beliefs and blind submission to authority in favor of embracing reason and freedom of thought.
I joined the Raelian Movement at age 18. I was not interested in joining any religion, having rejected Christianity a few years earlier and being a secular free-thinker. There was one single reason why I chose to devote my life totally and wholeheartedly to the Raelian Movement: reading the book “The Message given by Extraterrestrials” made me feel that I just had found the Truth that millions of people before me had been seeking their whole life. The shock was so profound that I felt I had no other choice than to place myself at the service of this Truth, which was going to become my sole purpose in life. The message explained that extraterrestrials had created life on Earth and had been mistaken for gods by their creation. It explained that all the prophets of all religions had been sent by those extraterrestrials and had teachings that were tailored to particular populations at particular times. Rael was the last prophet, preparing mankind for the official return to Earth of our creators, together with all their prophets which are scientifically being kept alive on their planet.
My first two decades as a Raelian were mostly a very positive experience. The Raelian teachings are extremely progressive and liberal, encouraging seeking pleasurable experiences and a liberated sexuality. At the same time, personal growth is encouraged, with an emphasis on non-violence, kindness, meditation and healthy living (no drugs, no tobacco, natural foods, fasting, …).
During the last ten years, I became increasingly frustrated by what I perceived as contradictions between the Message which was telling us that “science should be our religion” and some statements and claims which were clearly pseudo-scientific or even anti-science. At first, I thought these were just temporary glitches that would self-correct with time. In fact, it only got worse, and I realized that questioning and debating were not welcome. We had to “trust our leader” and support all his decisions, no matter how bizarre they might seem. I tried all I could to discuss with my co-religionists, trying to show them the contradictions with our scriptures, only to realize that most my Raelians friends were apparently unable to think logically. I was told to stop thinking, that I paid too much attention to details, and that I should focus on feeling instead, and humbly submit to our prophet without trying to understand.
A few months ago, unable to accept the contradictions and the irrationality anymore, I wrote a long letter to the Wise Council (a group of Bishops whose role is to make sure the Message is never betrayed). In it, I denounced what I understood were betrayals of the Message, basically the promotion of pseudo-science and irrational beliefs, as well as science denial. The Wise Council refused to take any action. I then decided to resign from my responsibilities, as a protest, but without rejecting the Message or formally leaving the movement. A few weeks later, frustrated at having achieved nothing, I decided to contact the Prophet himself. He reacted very negatively and ended up expelling me from the Raelian religion by canceling my baptism and banning me from any Raelian event for at least 7 years.
The Raelian Movement was my only purpose in life during 33 years, and I got expelled from it while trying to help it. Then things went from bad to worse as I realized that I had been lied to and manipulated for those 33 years. I was feeling abandoned and isolated, with a huge emptiness in my mind and nobody to talk to. It took several weeks before I started feeling as if I was awakening from a long hypnosis that had lasted 33 years, and, finally allowed myself to consider the obvious possibility that Rael was a fraud. So, progressively, this feeling of emptiness evolved into anger, anger at myself for having been so gullible, and anger at Rael for having defrauded thousands of people, for having stolen 33 years of my life and having shaped those 33 years according to his own selfish needs. Rebuilding my life with a new purpose, and a new social environment been challenging.